The Silent Weight of Solo Parenthood

No one really talks about the resentment that slowly seeps into your heart when you find yourself handling everything on your own. Society romanticizes the strength of single mothers, painting us as warriors who defy all odds. And while there is undeniable strength in raising a child alone, the reality is far more complicated than what people assume.

It takes two to make a baby, yet the number of women who are out here raising them alone keeps rising. The reasons vary some men walk away, others provide the bare minimum, and some are present but emotionally absent. Regardless of the cause, the outcome remains the same: a mother carrying the weight of parenthood alone.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my children more than anything in this world. Their laughter, their innocent questions, and the sheer joy they bring into my life make it all worthwhile. But there are moments when exhaustion creeps in, and I find myself wondering: What if? What if I handed my children over to their father and became the secondary parent? What if I got to be the one who visits on weekends, who sends money but doesn’t have to be up at 2 a.m. soothing a crying baby or figuring out school fees? Would life be easier? Would I feel lighter?

These are thoughts that no one dares to voice because society shames mothers who admit to struggling. We are expected to carry on with unwavering strength, as if we were built to withstand every storm without faltering. The world doesn’t afford us the space to say, I am tired. I need help. I don’t want to do this alone. Instead, we swallow our exhaustion, push forward, and bury the resentment under layers of responsibility.

But resentment doesn’t just disappear; it festers. It grows with every sleepless night, every missed opportunity, every sacrifice made without recognition. And then, one day, you find yourself sitting in the quiet, staring at the walls, and wondering if motherhood should feel this heavy.

This is not to say that we don’t love our children. It is not to say that we would abandon them. But there needs to be an honest conversation about the reality of solo parenting. About how the absence of an equal partner in raising a child isn’t just a burden; it’s a form of silent suffering.

So, to the women out there doing it alone: I see you. I hear you. You are not alone in your thoughts. And while the world may not acknowledge your exhaustion, I will. Because the truth is, being a mother is beautiful, but it is also unbearably heavy when you’re carrying it alone.